High Speed Crash - Just A Thought #59

Though never officially diagnosed, I always believed I was a bit ADHD.  Growing up I was the kid who fidgeted constantly.  I would tap my hands while reading a book, watching tv, etc...  I moved around when talking on the phone and could never sit still for long.  As a kid I was called hyper...as an adult, annoying!

I just always seemed to have "nervous energy" and was in constant motion.  I talked a mile a minute and could have given an auctioneer a run for his money.  For those who have taken the True Colors test, I am a high Orange!

"Slow down", was something I heard a lot as a child.  Well, ok--I heard that as an adult as well.

When I preached I would walk around constantly and talk as fast as I walked.

One friend talked to me about using concentrated movement when I spoke.  I tried to apply it with limited success.  A management course I was in the last couple years taught me a lot about personality types, etc... It helped a bit.  Then I had a "high speed crash" and my life has never been the same.

A little over a year and a half ago I had a concussion--my 6th--and it left me altered in some ways.  Mostly in my speech and the speed of my responses.  I have been forced to slow down when I talk or else I stumble over my words more.  Sarah says that my speed now is normal for most people but for me it feels as though I am swimming through molasses!  Yet this slower time has allowed me to process more what is happening around me.  Suddenly all of the stuff I have been hearing the last couple years is jelling together.  The concentrated movement, the personality stuff and the concussion have all combined to make a ....new Rick in some ways.

I am more contemplative, more aware, more reflective and at times a bit more emotional than I used to be.  The old "speedy" me crops up from time to time but when it does, I usually say something silly....like pointing at a snowman picture and repeatedly calling it Santa Claus or telling my daughter to "have good", when she is going to a friends house, instead of "have fun."

However, I take comfort in 2 verses.  They have taken on new meaning to me.  One is found in Ephesians 2:10, "For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them." The other is found in 2 Corinthians 5:17 and says, "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come."

I am aware that my behavior and the way I interact with others has changed somewhat.  I am also aware that, as we go deeper with God and press into Him more, He changes us as well.  I believe that He has used this concussion in a way that allows me to be more dependent on Him.   I am trusting that the change He is bringing runs deeper than how I operate post-concussion. 

Many want to change things in the new year, but the challenge is to let God be the one to work the change in us.


Anonymous said...

Thanks for sharing this, Rick. I'm moved by how instead of viewing your concussion as a curse, you see God using it to change you into more the person He is calling you to be. Your trust is contagious! Blessings to you and your family and your work. ~Stan

RDA said...

Thanks Stan. It took some time to not see it as a curse. It is definitely a blessing now.

Unknown said...

Rick, I share your struggle, brother. But I have found that slowing down was the best thing Father ever did to and for me. Sometimes it is like molasses! But the counter is, I think before I speak and act. Wisdom! Jesus has funny ways of working His Life within us; and He has become my Wisdom. Good to read your post:).

RDA said...

Thanks Ron. Yes Molasses would be a good description. I have also said a fog at times.

However God is good.