Ah first love. There is such emotion, such passion. When I fell in love with my wife, Sarah, there was all that and more. I was consumed by her. I wanted to do everything to please her, to woo her, to win her heart.
I found my interests matched hers, at least for a time, and that we shared similar thoughts.
Then we got married.
"But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first." Revelation 2:4
When I fell in love with the Lord, when I surrendered my heart to Him, there was also great passion. I had a great frenzy of desire to please Him. I through myself into the relationship wholeheartedly. I wanted to do everything for the Lord. I wanted to pray without ceasing, to win the lost, to work, work, WORK!
Then life happened.
I have heard these really guilt-ridden messages before where we are hammered to return to our first love.
The concept is great but it's the working out that seems to drive people nuts.
I love my wife passionately. However the longer we have been together the more I realize I can never get back those emotional, giddy feelings of first love that I once had. Nor do I want to. That love was based on feelings and hormones. It was not based on fact. The FACT is my love is deeper than those early days of heightened frenzy. I am more committed, more in love than I was when we first met. Our love is richer, fuller and real. (You can ask her, I'm not making it up!)
I love the Lord more and more each day. However I never want to go back to those days of heightened frenzy where I through myself into EVERYTHING "Christian" to prove my love to God and to keep the emotions going. It wasn't natural. It leads to burnout. I don't have to work to earn God's gift of Salvation.
One verse had become more real for me. It is 2 Corinthians 12:9, which talks about God's strength being made perfect in weakness. I am weak, I need to rest. I need to rest in God and quit trying to strive to win His favor. I need to accept His gift.
I believe that the call to return to our 1st love is not a call to return to a giddy emotion. I believe it is a call to commitment, to a deeper, more passionate love. So kick back, rest and enjoy the Lord!