I mess up.
There are times when I blow it and do not act the way I know God would have me to act. It seems I reflect Paul's struggle in Romans 7. It is times like this I have to call out for God's mercy and forgiveness.
I recognize my need for God's mercy. Without it I would be dead...literally! I want God, and others for that matter, to forgive me when I have done wrong.
Honestly...I don't always want God to extend that same grace to others.
I am ashamed to admit, I wish at times God would do a bit more smiting! I want vindication for those who are victims. I want the guilty party to receive the justice they deserve. Drop the hammer...or at least a lightening bolt or three!
Frankly, it boils down to justice for others and mercy for me!
I am reminded of Matthew 7:1-3 which says, "“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye?"
Why is it that I want to hold others to a higher standard than I hold myself? Why do I want to hold the sins of others against them?
More to the point...who am I to play God?
It's a struggle.
I see lots of "guilty" people in my line of work. Drug addicts, abusers, sinners...yet they are all where I was once...lost.
My prayer is that each finds the same measure of mercy through the work of Jesus Christ that I did.
Forgiven...a name we all need.